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I had someone ask for
an aisle seats so that his or her hair wouldn't get messed up by being
near the window.
A client called in inquiring
about a package to Hawaii. After going over all the cost info,
she asked, "Would it be cheaper to fly to California and then take the
train to Hawaii?"
I got a call from a woman
who wanted to go to Capetown. I started to explain the length
of the flight and the passport information when she interrupted me with
"I'm not trying to make you look stupid, but Capetown is in Massachusetts.
"Without trying to make her look like the stupid one, I calmly explained,
"Capecod is in Massachusetts, Capetown is in Africa." Her response
... click.
A man called, furious
about a Florida package we did. I asked what was wrong with the vacation
in Orlando. He said he was expecting an ocean-view room. I tried to
explain that is not possible, since Orlando is in the middle of the
state. He replied, "Don't lie to me. I looked on the map and Florida
is a very thin state."
I got a call from a man
who asked, "Is it possible to see England from Canada?" I said, "No."
He said "But they look so close on the map."
Another man called and
asked if he could rent a car in Dallas. When I pulled up the reservation,
I noticed he had a 1-hour lay over in Dallas. When I asked him
why he wanted to rent a car, he said, "I heard Dallas was a big airport,
and I need a car to drive between the gates to save time."
A nice lady just called.
She needed to know how it was possible that her flight from Detroit
left at 8:20am and got into Chicago at 8:33am. I tried to explain
that Michigan was an hour ahead of llinois, but she could not understand
the concept of time zones. Finally I told her the plane went very fast,
and she bought that!
A woman called and asked,
"Do airlines put your physical description on your bag so they know
who's luggage belongs to who?" I said, "No, why do you ask?" She replied,
"Well, when I checked in with the airline, they put a tag on my luggage
that said FAT, and I'm overweight, is there any connection?" After putting
her on hold for a minute while I "looked into it" (I was actually laughing)
I came back and explained the city code for Fresno is FAT, and that
the airline was just putting a destination tag on her luggage.
I just got off the phone
with a man who asked, "How do I know which plane to get on?" I asked
him what exactly he meant, which he replied, "I was told my flight number
is 823, but none of these darn planes have numbers on them."
A woman called and said,
"I need to fly to Pepsi-cola on one of those computer planes." I asked
if she meant to fly to Pensacola on a commuter plane. She said, "Yeah,
whatever."
A businessman called and
had a question about the documents he needed in order to fly to China.
After a lengthy discussion about passports, I reminded him he needed
a visa. "Oh no I don't, I've been to China many times and never had
to have one of those." I double checked and sure enough, his stay required
a visa. When I told him this he said, "Look, I've been to China four
times and every time they have accepted my American Express."
A woman called to make
reservations, "I want to go from Chicago to Hippopotamus, New York"
The agent was at a loss for words. Finally, the agent: "Are you sure
that's the name of the town?" "Yes, what flights do you have?" replied
the customer. After some searching, the agent came back with, "I'm sorry,
ma'am, I've looked up every airport code in the country and can't find
a Hippopotamus anywhere." The customer retorted, "Oh don't be silly.
Everyone knows where it is. Check your map!" The agent scoured a map
of the state of New York and finally offered, "You don't mean Buffalo,
do you?" "That's it! I knew it was a big animal!"
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